To influence people, make 3 simple changes to how you talk, says executive coach: Success 'depends on your ability to persuade'

Why do decision-makers at work really choose one person for a role over another? What actually makes them trust someone's judgment? How do they decide in practice who to tap for important opportunities?

For the last 12 years, I've coached top performers at some of the world's largest and most competitive Fortune 500 companies. As a result, I've been a trusted advisor to executives, C-suite leaders, and hiring managers who've confided in me their answers to all these questions. 

Over time I've seen that technical expertise gets you far, but your ability to communicate persuasively determines whether your opinion is actively sought out or you have to fight to get your voice heard. 

I've watched this play out across different industries and ranks. The ability to influence others can set you up for success. And vice versa. Take the smart subject matter expert who can't translate their work into the language of decision-makers, for example, or the skilled but inarticulate manager who gets passed over for promotion.

Your impact and advancement at work depends on your ability to persuade others.

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Becoming persuasive doesn't mean resorting to manipulation, mind games, or politicking. In fact, the most powerful communicators I've worked with are thoughtful professionals who've learned to leverage their perceptiveness strategically. They understand psychology: how people think, what drives their choices, and how to present ideas to get seen, heard, and paid. 

The good news is that persuasive communication is a learnable skill. Here are my three favorite strategies to get started. Pick one to try today, and watch how differently people respond to your contributions.

Decision-makers are busy and overwhelmed. When you take too long to get to your point, you risk losing their attention, and you may inadvertently signal that you don't have a good handle on your own message.

Contrast this with someone who can articulate their key point in a few crisp sentences. That level of clarity suggests expertise and confidence.

To be more persuasive, start with your conclusion, request, or recommendation, then follow with supporting evidence as needed. This might sound like: 

• "I recommend pushing the product launch to September. The three factors driving this are …."
• "We need to consider redesigning our app's navigation by Q3 to stop losing users. The data shows …."
• "Can you review this report by Thursday? I need your input specifically on X and Y."

Before your next meeting, write down your main "take-home" message in one to two clear sentences. That constraint forces you to filter out the fluff and focus on the information that matters. 

Persuasive communicators have mastered the art of translation. They reframe their messages through the lens of their audience's needs.

People in power don't just want clever solutions. They want good ideas that speak directly to their pressures, pain points, and priorities. Make that connection and you'll gain a competitive edge. 

For example, instead of saying, "This new system will improve data processing efficiency by 40%," you might say, "This solution will help you deliver quarterly reports three days faster, giving you more time to prepare for board meetings." 

Even when you need to defer or push back, the same principle applies. Jazz up a simple "I'll get back to you," by saying instead, "I want to make sure I give you the most useful answer for your quarterly planning. Can I have until Friday to gather the specific data you'll need?"

Small shifts in your word choice can dramatically change how your message lands, especially with senior stakeholders.

Consider the difference between saying "I think we should …" versus "In my experience …" One signals uncertainty, the other expertise.

Or how about "I'm trying to …" versus "We're implementing …"? The first suggests struggle, the second implies purposeful action.

Look for opportunities to swap weak verbs with more powerful ones. For example: 

• "Had to" can become "decided to," "chose to," or "opted to" 
• "Helped" could be replaced with "guided," "directed," "led," "advised," or "oversaw"

Don't get caught up in fancy words or corporate jargon. This is about choosing more precise language that reflects the scale and scope of your actions. 

Melody Wilding, LMSW, is an executive coach, human behavior professor, and author of "Managing Up: How to Get What You Need from the People in Charge." Download exact scripts to diplomatically say no at work here.

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