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Kat Bogdon, 37, feels panic every day as she rations the creamer for her morning coffee. Could she maybe use a little bit less? Could she use milk instead?
The Buffalo, New York, native has been living in financial limbo since being laid off in early June, and has had to turn to food stamps. But now even that lifeline has been taken away as she has become one of an estimated 41.7 million Americans affected by the federal pause of the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP).
“Daily things that are normal feel like luxuries,” Bogdon tells TIME. “It almost feels like a bit of dignity and a bit of choice—a lot of choice and autonomy is stripped away from you.”
Read more: Why Are Democrats Voting to End the Shutdown? Here’s What Guided Their Thinking
The battle over SNAP, also known as food stamps, has been playing out both in the courts and Congress amid the longest government shutdown in U.S. history.
Even as eight Senate Democrats looked close to striking a deal with their Republican counterparts on Monday to pass a spending bill and put an end to the shutdown, the fate of SNAP payments was still uncertain as the Trump Administration was appealing a court order to release November’s payments in full.
That uncertainty has made life difficult for Bogdon and many like her.
“I tell myself over and over, ‘It's going to be okay, I'm going to be okay. I can just dip into savings. I have a family that can help,” she says. “It's not an end-of-the-road situation for me, but it's still incredibly stressful that a program that I pay into for my taxes, that when I need it, can be stripped away from me at any moment in time, just for political theater.”
Bogdon was among the lucky ones amid the chaos. A back-and-forth has ensued in the courts over the past few weeks as the Trump Administration has fought federal orders to release emergency funds to pay the benefits, leading to an unequal distribution across the country.
About 20 states had started the process of dispersing full “food stamp” benefits before the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) told states that they should “immediately undo any steps taken to issue full SNAP benefits for November 2025” or be “liable for any overissuances that result from the noncompliance.” Bogdon received her full SNAP income of $140 a month over the weekend, although other families have not been as lucky.
'It hurts a lot'
Nina Amen, a 38-year-old mother based in Stark County, Ohio, gets emotional as she discusses the current political situation and the negative portrayal of people who rely on food stamps.
“I don't know how to explain it, but it just hurts a lot,” says Amen, who is on disability assistance and cannot work. (More than half of U.S. households experiencing food insecurity have at least one person working full time, according to the USDA.)
Amen receives an average of $367 a month for herself and her 14-year-old daughter, but that amount alone is not enough to cover food costs amid rising inflation and broader increases in grocery prices reported since the pandemic, so she supplements her SNAP benefits by visiting local food pantries. She also tries to help others who don’t have their own transport get to the food banks.
“I feel pretty powerless, which is frustrating, but I wish I could help people more,” she says.
More than 50 million Americans similarly rely on food banks and pantries for help, although these centers are also feeling overburdened. Last week, Ohio food pantries recorded a surge in need, as federal workers went over a month without pay. Food banks across the country purchased nearly 325% more food during the week of October 27 than at the same time last year to meet demand, according to Feeding America.
Amen says that she’s noticed food banks are giving out smaller amounts of food, presumably to meet the increased demand. And even with that additional help, Amen says that her local pantry often does not provide refrigerated items, such as milk, that she deems essential. “In my area, it's rare to find something refrigerated, like milk. “Thankfully, I've been okay. People started helping us stuff like that, so she hasn't gone without milk yet,” she says. “[But] I'm very hurt. I don't understand it at all. I can't comprehend it.”
Amen received her last SNAP payment on October 5. If the shutdown isn't resolved and her payments don’t resume, she’s not sure how long she can keep relying on others for help.
“I don't know how long people can help me, you know?” she says. “There's people I love, like other people in my support group, for example, that are thinking about putting themselves in dangerous situations just to get food.”
Both Bogdon and Amen have felt hurt by the public backlash to people on SNAP that has emerged from the shutdown and debate over food stamps.
Bogdon’s difficulties throughout this month have caused her to think of her grandmother, a Ukrainian refugee who fled the Holodomor and grew up in an orphanage.
“Her mother died young from pneumonia and her father was an alcoholic,” she says. “I think of her a lot as I navigate a broken system and society that seeks to shame you for accessing the basic necessities. She received social services, and her and my grandfather made a good life for themselves here.”
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